Dr. Thomas Jay Oppewal

With heartfelt gratitude for his life and for all he gave to those around him, we announce the passing of Dr. Thomas “Tom” Jay Oppewal, age 71, of Durham, North Carolina, who died peacefully in his home on March 21, 2025 surrounded by his family. Tom was born on December 18, 1953, in Worcester, Massachusetts, to Leona and Jacob Oppewal.

Tom was a beloved husband to his wife of nearly 37 years, Sonda Maye (Riedesel) Oppewal, and a devoted father to his two daughters, Anneke (Marcos Negrete) Oppewal of Durham, NC, and Alyssa (Rusty) Geary of Greensboro, NC. He is also survived by his sisters: Faith (Henry) Lane of Whitinsville, MA, Peggy (Dan) Wierenga of Tamworth, NH, and Cynthia (Steve) Mellema of Alamo, CA; siblings-in-law: Linda (Rod) Owen of Staunton, VA, Brenda (Harold) Graziano of Bluffton, SC, Mark (Sally) Riedesel of Melbourne, FL, Marsha (Mike) Thornburgh of Grover, MO; along with many nieces and nephews who brought him great joy and made him smile.

Throughout his life, Tom was known for his kind and caring heart, his love of nature and the outdoors, his dedication to environmental causes, his handyman skills, and his warm, ever-present smile. A lifelong lover of nature, Tom found peace and inspiration in the great outdoors. Whether hiking many sections of the Appalachian Trail, tending to his garden and sharing his produce, quickly identifying a bird call or plant, building a serpentine rock wall, or simply enjoying the beauty of a sunrise, Tom had a deep and enduring appreciation for the natural world. Tom also loved to see nature through bike riding. His most notable ride was after graduating from high school when he biked from Whitinsville, Massachusetts to Rangely, Maine. Tom was also incredibly gifted with his hands. He was able to fix nearly anything around our house or neighbors’ homes, and he put his skills to use in other settings such as creating props for church musicals. He also created intricate oak splint baskets and woodworking projects that his family continues to cherish.

In both his personal life and professional endeavors, Tom approached everything with passion, care, persistence, and commitment. A graduate of Calvin College (now Calvin University in Grand Rapids, MI), he made a lasting impact on the many lives he touched, as a teacher and environmental educator, inspiring others to appreciate and protect the environment. Tom worked as an environmental educator at both the Glen Helen Outdoor Education Center (where birdwatching became a passion) and Oatland Island Wildlife Center (where he especially enjoyed caring for the bobcats and teaching teachers and students about the environment). These formative experiences ultimately led him to pursue and earn his Ed. D. in Curriculum and Instruction at the University of Virginia in 1991. Tom went on to be a professor of teacher education at East Tennessee State University, The University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, North Carolina State University, and Peace College (now William Peace University). Earning a doctoral degree was no easy feat as he had to overcome learning disabilities. When faced with challenges, be they professional or personal, Tom held closely to his grandfather Teake’s saying “they said it couldn’t be done, and this is how we did it.”

Tom had a heart for helping others that reached far and wide. Whether working at Camp Tall Turf, serving as a church elder, volunteering as a mentor to students faced with probation cases and later as a Blue-Ribbon Mentor Advocate for a young teenager, or assisting with PORCH to provide food for those in need, Tom was always there to lend a hand and wanted to serve where he was needed. He also took trips to Ecuador, Peru, and Belize with fellow science educators to share and continue to learn about environmental education. Tom was a dedicated member of the churches he attended. At his most recent church home since 2001, University Presbyterian Church, he served as an Elder, on the boards of Presbyterian Campus Ministry and New Hope Camp and Conference Center, and the Global Outreach Committee. He chaperoned trips to Montreat and Appalachia Service Projects, and assisted with teacher development in Haiti. Throughout it all, Tom lived by a deep sense of loving his neighbors and strived to leave things better than he found them. Even in later years, it was not uncommon to see Tom weeding various parts of his neighborhood on a walk or reminding others that “laughter is the best medicine.”

Tom had a long journey with dementia. When he was diagnosed with mild cognitive impairment, he became aware it was affecting his ability to teach. So he made the decision to stop full-time work as a professor of education. His diagnosis progressed to early-onset Alzheimer’s Disease, and the disease advanced more rapidly during the pandemic. In August 2023, Sonda and Tom, with their daughter Anneke and her husband Marcos, combined households to provide support for Tom’s caregiving. It was a true blessing that Tom was able to attend both his daughter Alyssa’s wedding in 2022 and his daughter Anneke’s wedding in 2024, moments that will be cherished by his family forever.

Tom’s family and friends will always hold close to the time they spent with him, and he will be remembered fondly as a loving husband, father, brother, uncle, friend, neighbor, educator, and passionate advocate for the environment. His friends and family will also miss his contagious laughter, warm smile, and the words of encouragement he would offer, always reminding others of how wonderful they are.

The family would like to extend heartfelt thanks to the many loving and caring individuals who made a tremendous difference in Tom’s life, especially in his final few years including:

• Duke Dementia Family Support Program Staff and Friends
• Caregivers at: The Charles House, Durham Center for Senior Life Adult Day Health Center, Seniors Helping Seniors, Duke Hospice, and The Enclave at Pinedale
• Personal Caregivers: Don Lentz, Betty Allen, Deborah Norfleet, Kat Bell, Robenia Jones, Cecelia Bynum

A service of witness to the resurrection in celebration of Tom’s life will be on Saturday, April 12, 2025 at 11 a.m. with a reception to follow, at University Presbyterian Church (209 E. Franklin Street, Chapel Hill, NC). Parking at the church is limited to ADA spaces. See this link for parking information near the church: https://upcch.org/ visit/#parking .  The service will be live-streamed, and later recorded at https://upcch.org/worship/live/

While Tom loved flowers, we know he would appreciate monetary donations in his honor to help others, such as:

• Duke Dementia Family Support ( https://www.gifts.duke.edu/dukehealth/?designation=3910194 )
• University Presbyterian Church ( https://onrealm.org/upcch/-/form/give/now ) (Misc Memorial Gifts)
• Friends of Oatland Island Wildlife Center ( https://www.friendsofoatland.org/support )